Ya know what I love? When people ask for advice and then tell you all the reasons why your advice is wrong. Those people are called “askholes”.
It doesn’t matter what it is…fitness, relationships, work, etc. Anytime I’ve ever approached someone for their advice, it was because they had knowledge I wanted. If I wanted to be fit, I would talk to someone who was fit. If I wanted relationship advice, I would ask someone who had a relationship I admired. You get the idea.
Maybe it’s because their advice will require too much work. What? You thought they’d tell you they got their six pack abs from eating six donuts every morning? Or they have a successful business because they play Candy Crush all day? Reaching goals takes work. Being healthy takes work. A successful career takes work. A marriage takes work. When those people tell you about the work, you can’t discount that advice.
Once you hear the advice, you have to decide if you still want to reach that goal. Are you willing to pay the price to get where you want? If you aren’t already where you want to be, obviously you have to start doing some things differently. (Or maybe stop doing certain things.) If you aren’t willing to do those things, perhaps you’re pursuing the wrong goals.
Ask yourself, which do I dislike more? Do I dislike my current job more or would I dislike the ups and downs and time investment of running my own business? Which is worse? Whichever causes you the most discomfort is the one you will avoid even if you think you want it. Your mouth might be saying you are MEANT to be an entrepreneur, but your brain is saying, “Dude, all that working sounds like a lot of work! Plus I have this steady paycheck. Plus if things go south, I can just find another job.” If that is in the back of your mind, no matter how much you think you want to start your own business, you will find a million excuses not to.
You need to be real with yourself if you are ever to reach your true happiness potential. If it’s your body image that’s holding you back, you probably already know what to do to get a better body. The question is, are you willing to do it? No? How much work are you willing to put in? What results will that give you? Will you be satisfied with those results? If you aren’t willing to put in the work of a fitness model, you can’t expect to look like a fitness model. If you are willing to do a moderate amount of work, be realistic about what you can expect from that.
If you want to be able to eat dessert guilt free, I think that’s AWESOME! So do I. Eating dessert occasionally will give me “X” results. Eating dessert a couple of times per week will give me “Y” results. Eating dessert every single day will give me “Z” results. I have to realistically determine the results I want and how much dessert I want. I’m definitely not giving it up, so I won’t get “X” results. Even though I would LOVE to eat dessert every day, I don’t want “Z” results. That leaves me with “Y”. I don’t get to eat it every day, but I still get “Y” results. Kind of like Goldilocks – I have to find what is just right.
If I ever had a conversation with a fitness model, I’m sure I would have to ask them about their routine. I would love to know what their workouts are and how they eat, wouldn’t you?. I would also know as soon as I hear what they say that I wouldn’t be willing to do all that. So, I need to understand I won’t look like that either. I wouldn’t stand there and make excuses. I wouldn’t assume she had more time than me or better resources than me. I wouldn’t assume she has more support or more money or more anything. However, I would know that for her, looking that way was important enough to her to do all those things. And that’s cool; that’s her compromise. I have to find mine. Oh, and not be an askhole about it.